Checking in

Just checking in again. Last week was a busy week. I had chemo on Monday. It didn't go as I planned. The chemo sessions are still the same amount of time. Now with the infusion I go every week and have to have blood work done weekly as well. It is nice not wearing the pump though. I felt much better to. I didn't have to take anything for nausea this time. Besides chemo, I worked 2 doubles and an extra day. Sally wasn't very happy but I felt like I didn't have much of a choice. I didn't want to let my work down and I always feel like I have to prove that I can handle my job. Plus, we can always use a larger pay check. I felt fine except for being tired on the double shifts. I think anyone would if they only had 8 hours before their next shift.
Starting next week I am going to be on 12 hour shifts again unless it changes again. Eventually, I will go back to the chemo pump I think.

Kaity needed to have some test done because of her legs pains. Since I had to work a lot last week, Sally had to take her. My mother in law went with them. I was relieved I didn't have to go with. I had a hard time when I went with Zachary for his shots and another time when he had to have blood drawn. It breaks my heart. I know as of dad I am suppose to be strong but stuff like that I am a wuss. Anyways, I like when Sally is the bad one taking the kids to be tortured then I can comfort them when they get home and tell them their mom is a big meanie. Kaity though, was fine when she was done. They bribed her with stickers, a lollipop, a stuffed monkey, and pancakes.Which makes me wonder why I don't get those things when I go for my blood work. I would be happy with just a candy bar. Kaity still has her bandage on from one of her pokes. Sally said she is leaving that for me to pull off. I was hoping by the 3rd day it would fall off but nope. I think it's glued on and I don't see a problem with it being on her. If it doesn't bother her being on then I think we should just leave it.

It wouldn't be a Bill Ceiga blog if I didn't write something I felt was funny about my family. So here it is. On the way to mass last week all three of the kids were in the back seat. Zachary said that Michael had bad breath. Michael said he didn't and told Zachary to "shut up". Sally said "no Michael you do", and said that Michael has a unique smell in the morning. Zachary had to add "yeah! like a dead fish". I think it was the first time in history Michael was lost for words. He just walked a head of us in to church with his head hanging low. I don't condone my kids being mean to each other. However, with Michael and Zachary being 11 years apart, Michael is the one that is usually tormenting and saying mean things to Zachary. Zachary being much younger is the one who is left heart broken and in pain. It was just a classic moment to see Zachary in his glory and for once getting his brother back. It is also funny because a few years ago when Michael had braces, Sally and I found the most perfect ornament that reminded us of Michael. It was a fish ornament that had a huge smile wearing braces. How ironic now.

Since I didn't get to see the kids very much I would try to call them on my breaks. Thursday I called when Zachary got home from school. He was very sad and told me he had a bad day. I was expecting him to be happy because he had Friday off and is going to have tomorrow (Monday) off as well. I asked my pumpkin why is he so sad. He said "I got homework and it's not fair. I never get homework for the weekend". I later found it was 2 math sheets that will take him less them 10 minutes to finish.

Last Sunday we had a birthday party to go to for my two God Children. When it was time for the cake, My mother in law was passing out the incredible edibles. She was going person to person with a smile on her face. When she was all done, I noticed red toe prints all over the floor throughout the kitchen and living room area. I knew right away who it came from. I just started laughing and telling everyone, except the person who made the tracks about the prints. I didn't want to embarrass my Mother in law Mary, so I just did the mature thing and laughed about it for awhile. Finally , my sister in law Sandy told my mother in law to look under her socks and sure enough there it was, a big red blotch. I guess she felt she needed to leave tracks throughout the house so she wouldn't get lost finding her way back to the kitchen.

I slept in today. It felt good. We will go to the evening mass tonight. I decided to write the blog early so I can spend the rest of the day with my family. I am going to do something with Zachary. Not sure what but I am sure if I ask him he can give me lots of ideas what to do with him. Kaity is trying to help me write this so I think that is my clue to get off the computer. Hope everyone has a good week.

Now for the next round!

I see Sally told everyone what was going on. I worked 6 days last week so I didn't have much time to write the blog. Tomorrow, I go back in for chemo. As of this moment I think I am going to try the weekly treatments but if it becomes to much of a pain I will go back to the pump. I might change my mind when I get there tomorrow. Talk about being shocked. I expected the worse, that the cancer came back but I never expected to hear at least another year of chemo. Usually, it is Sally who is the one that is nervous about the test results. This time she was really calm (unless she is learning to hide it well) and I was the one who was a basket case. I was planning on taking Sally out this weekend to celebrate being cancer free (if that was the case) but the 12 more months of chemo doesn't have me doing the happy dance.

When I am home I usually run all the errands with Sally and kids in tole. Usually we end up doing most of the grocery shopping at Meijer( Strack and Van Tils is still the official Grocery Store of Bill's Life with Cancer Blog). The last couple of times I had been stopping in the isles making notes in my handy dandy little note book. Usually, it's one of the kids making a scene or causing embarrassment. However, this particular day it was not the kids, it wasn't even me, it was my wife. My wife always tells the kids to be quiet and not to make comments when out in front of people. She usually nudges me when I slip on a rare occasion but I have to admit sometimes it's hard to keep quiet when I find someone amusing or annoying. We were walking in the freezer section and I heard a "eeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwww". It didn't come from my kids but from Sally. Some reason when there is a fowl odor in the air I am the one always blamed. This time it wasn't me. I saw a couple on the side of me looking at some frozen food items. After Sally made her RUDE very loud comment the lady looked at the man she was with and said something. The next thing I see is them scurrying off. I almost fell to my knees with laughter. Sally usually doesn't insert shoe into her mouth, but this time I think she got a whole boot with wool socks.

A couple of days later we were at Meijer again. This time we only had Kaity. We were Christmas shopping in the toy section. I had the honors of watching Kaity while Sally was looking. Kaity ran up to Sally and had something in her mouth. I knew what it was. It was a gumball. I didn't know where she got it from and I tried to get out of her mouth but there was no way I was going to let her bite me. Anyways, germs are needed to build up her immune system. Sally grabbed Kaity and took the gumball out of her mouth. I was wondering what had more germs the gumball or Sally's fingers. Sally walked away to do more shopping. Kaity was left gum less and a little upset. Then again she went down a toy isle and I just watched her do her thing. She went up to a gum ball machine and there was a package of gum ball opened next to it. So she helped herself to another gum ball. I was proud of her for being self sufficient. After she got her gum in her mouth she was on the quest to find her mom. I think she wanted to prove to Sally that she is going to have that gum one way or another. We started walking towards Sally and about a mile away Sally spotted that Kaity had something in her mouth. Sally ran towards Kaity to save her from the germs in her mouth with her germie fingers. I saved the day and pinned Sally down to tell her that it was perfectly safe since it wasn't on the floor. Then Sally started lecturing Kaity and I that it was stealing and told us we were going to jail.

This morning we went to mass. Kaity is turning into the diva. I helped her get dressed for church. I put her Christmas dress on her and she kept saying "thank you". Then I caught her in the mirror staring at herself while she was putting lip gloss on. She walked into church wearing her silver shoes, a purple flower in her hair, a pearl neckless and bracelet, and a white furry coat. Miss Hollywood she looked like. As soon as we walked in the doors she started saying "Hello" to everyone. We walked in the church which was very quiet and there was Miss Hollywood continuing to say "Hello!" to everyone. Usually she will take off her coat but not today. She had to keep that big fluffy coat on (Thanks Deb). It made it difficult for Sally to hold her during mass. I was lucky because Kaity didn't want to burden me with the extra weight and bulk.

Have a good week everyone. I am off to my two god children's birthday party this afternoon.

Prayer requests and update on Bill

This is Sally. Bill is in bed sleeping since he is working the midnight shift tonight. I would first like to ask for some prayers. Since we have been so blessed with prayers I would like to see others blessed as well. The first person is Gerry. Gerry was just diagnosed with colon cancer. The tumor was so large the colonoscopy couldn't not be completed just like Bill's. Not sure when the surgery will be but prayers are much needed.

The second person is for Lynn's dad. Lynn is a friend of Deb who is one of Bill's devoted blog follower and our good friend. He was recently diagnosed with cancer in his lymph node and lung. He will be having surgery in the near future.

The third prayer request is for a friend. Just like when it seems it can't get any worse for her it does. She is in a lot of pain and has no medical coverage. Plus she is in financial hardship.

As for Bill, well I am happy and he is not. The CT scan and PET scan came out clean. He is still in remission. Thank God. However, there has been some misunderstanding and Bill was caught off guard today. I think one of the hardest jobs in the world is to be an oncologist, even just to work in that department would be difficult. His doctor is very upbeat which I know it's very important in the recovery process. However, his doctor paints a rosier picture and doesn't tell the entire story. I understand the reasoning for it. If he were to tell Bill from day one that he would have at least 3 years of therapy I think Bill would would have given up. It would sound hopeless. Telling Bill he had 12 rounds and then later options will be discussed sounds a lot better.

Bill had the 18 rounds and today the "options" were discussed but not to Bill's liking. Which I don't blame him. At least he has choices (sort of). The first choice is to do nothing. Usually that is what a lot of older people do but for Bill, it's not recommended. The second option is just to have the Avastin therapy. This also is not an aggressive treatment plan and is not recommended for Bill. The other choice he has is to do Avastin and 5-FU which is recommended to help prevent the cancer from coming back. The 5-FU is given to him during the treatment plus he has it in a pump in which he wears for 46 hours. Bill hates wearing the pump and was so looking forward to no more pump. The though about having to wear the pump was not good news to him. The other thing is that 5-FU can be infused to him on a weekly basis. This way there will be no pump. On the other hand though, the effectiveness of this way is not known. The doctors' believe the pump is more effective but there is no data to support it either way. We were also lead to believe treatment would be for another 3 months but was told today it is recommended for another year. After the year and if he is still in remission then he will just have to have the Avastin therapy.

So even though the results were good it was still a gloomy day for Bill. Plus, he had only 3 hours of sleep. It was a lot of information to digest all at once. I want the best possible out come for him but the choice is his. I do not have to walk around with a pump connected to me so I don't know what he is going through. I do know it is cumbersome for him and that it gets in his way when he is at work. The doctor and I both suggested to him to think about it. So he didn't have chemo today but rescheduled it for Monday. On the way home we stopped at one of his favorite places and he had a plate of spaghetti. We talked about his options. As of now I think he is deciding on the weekly infusion treatments and not the pump. When his department at work goes back to the 12 hour shifts he will go back to the pump because then he can plan the treatments so he won't have to wear the pump at work.

Almost a year ago he was diagnosed with stage IV colon cancer. It didn't seem possible to get where we are at now. But by the grace of God, prayers and support of family, friends, and strangers he had came a long way. Maybe, it's not what Bill has hoped for but he will be fine after a good night sleep. He is a very lucky man.

Just a quick note

One last post before I go back to work. I start tomorrow night working midnights. I am thankful for having a job and being able to work, but I am not ready to go back. I enjoy being home. Plus I wanted to do so much more when I was off but the flu bug put a damper on things.

This afternoon, I went in for the PET scan. Not really sure what the difference between a CT scan and a PET scan. Not sure why I need both done but from what Sally had read it's normal to have both of them for colon cancer. I will admit I was very nervous about the test. I woke up feeling sick to my stomach.I contributed it to my nerves. Yes, probably every thing will turn out fine. Yes, I do trust in God and have faith. But until you have been in my shoes (I hope no one ever has to) it's really hard to understand what I am going through. Really, I am not whining or complaining but just trying to express what it is like to go through this. In 5 days I will be getting the test results. In a matter of seconds the results can change my life again and then again in a matter of seconds a large weight will be lifted from Sally and I for the time being.

After the scan, Sally and I went out to lunch. I was told to wait at least an hour before I can home because of Zachary and Kaity. It was just a precaution because of the chemical they injected me with before the scan. I was hungry and it was nice to get some alone time with the wife. When we got home, Zachary was in the living room. I went to give him a pat and he ran away from me yelling. He said "Don't touch me! I don't want to glow." The rest of they day he avoided me like the black plague. Sally's mom was watching the kids. She was teasing Zachary that the reason why we couldn't go home right after the test is because I was glowing. We often forget how serious Zachary takes everything.

New Years Eve we celebrated like we normally do. Sally made lots of snacks for us toasted raviolis, buffalo wings, sweet barbecue wings, onion straws, vegetable pot stickers, Mexican dip, weenie wraps, pineapple cheese ball, and dip with chips. Why did she make all of that for just us? I have no idea. She does it every year but you won't hear me complain. Funny thing is that a lot of the stuff she makes, she won't even eat. Zachary now is becoming like her and is getting where he doesn't want to eat meat either. I watched "UP' with the kids while she was cooking. Every year I take the kids to Main Square to watch the fire works at midnight. I would take Michael when he was younger and now I take Zachary. This year though, Sally offered to take Zachary. I really wanted to go but the cold really effects me badly because of the chemo side effects. I would have taken Zachary if Sally didn't want to because I don't want the kids to miss out because there dad is sick.

Last night I rented "Julia & Julia" for Sally and me to watch. If you haven't seen I highly recommend it. Sally said she will be posting on the blog Thursday evening to let everyone know what the doctor has said.

Hope everyone has a good week.
God Bless
Bill

But seriously folks

First off I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year, and I hope a year with hope, love and triumph. Keep positive thoughts and everything will be OK. Don't sweat the small things This is my mentality and I am living a happier life because of it. Like I have said before, cancer has been a blessing in many ways. God will close a door and open another one up. You just have to have the foresight and want to go through it. 2009 didn't get off to a good start but it did end up being a good year. I have learned and grown a lot over the year. Cancer has been a life changing event but like I had said before I am a man with cancer but cancer doesn't have me. I have also learned not to plan my life away but to live it now. I thank God for blessing me with humor. I don't think I would have been able to make it this far without it. Sally or myself always find something to laugh at when things don't always go our way. Usually it's Sally finding something about me to laugh at but never the less one of us is usually laughing but usually both. The kids are a riot too, and help me through some of the tuff times.

I have a PET scan scheduled tomorrow at 12 noon(Jan 2). I will be having my CT scan on the 6Th starting at 3. Then, depending on the results, will start back up with chemo on Thursday. So I will have the results back by the end of next week. I am praying for the best, but will take any result with stride. Even if it may not be the best result, I will be OK, about a day or two afterwards. So remember me in your thoughts and prayers in the coming week.

Often family and friends make comments on how well I look and how well I am doing. As if I am fine and cured. The truth is I am doing well. The other truth is there are many days I get out of bed not feeling so well. I push myself to get dress and go to work and try to live a normal life. I don't want cancer to stop my life. Plus, I need to take care of my family sick or not sick. I also have a feeling people think that since I am in remission I made it. The fact is I made it this far. The longer I go the chances of my survival improves. The other truth is the longer I go the harder it is on me at testing time. I know the probability of something showing up is great. The longer I go cancer free, the more nervous I become thinking these results will be the dreaded ones. Yes I am positive as positive as I can be. I am realistic and that is important as well. I am not taking my life for granted but even when I didn't have cancer I should have never taken it for granted. Like most people out there,I thought it won't happen to me, guess what!

I haven't posted as often as I would have liked since I have been home the last 2 weeks. I have been trying to shorten my blogs a little so I didn't get to finish about my Christmas. Sally and I are often easily amused and Christmas night was one of those times. I went to bed earlier then usual. Sally followed a little later. A few minutes later Sally had gotten out of bed and came back shortly later. She mentioned about hearing some sounds. I heard silverware in the kitchen fall but I thought Michael was up. Michael was in his room. Sally also notice a curtain that we never open was opened. A lamp in our room was turning on and off. I actually had to turn it on, thinking maybe it was between on and off, it wasn't. Michael said his lamp was also turning on and off. So I decided to use my fine ghost busting skills to figure out what was going on and I couldn't figure anything out( my fine skills at work). So I went back to bed scratching my head. Sally and I were lying in bed and we than heard Michael in the bathroom. First he had the hiccups which lead us to the giggles. Then he starting coughing like he has been smoking 3 packs of cigarettes for the last 20 years. Then we calmed down a bit and heard Michael dropping deuces so we started laughing again (we are so mature).

After all of that we tried to go to sleep, by this time it was after midnight. Sally asked me if I heard music playing from outside. I couldn't hear anything. She was becoming annoyed because I couldn't hear it. So she had Michael lay in bed with us to see if he could hear it and he couldn't either. I finally kicked Michael out of bed and went to use the washroom. When I came back Sally was laughing again. She said not only she hears music but it sounds like either a cat in heat or the neighbor next door trying to sing. I listened again and I finally heard it. Sally sent Michael outside to investigate. We heard Michael on the neighbors driveway coughing away. Talk about trying to be secretive. Michael came back to report that in fact it was our neighbor trying to sing. So then Michael decided to prank call them. I told him to ask them if they can carry a tune. If they said yes, tell them if they can carry it somewhere else, so we can sleep. He called and blocked his number . They picked up and said "hello" the Michael said "Uuuuuuuu Hi can you uuuuuuuu carry uuuuu a tune?"." What did you want me to say?" I thought you got to be kidding me. It's not like I was asking him to recite the Declaration of Independence. Then we heard a click. Michael called right back the he heard another click. Soon after the singing stopped. In the mean time Sally and I laid in bed laughing at our neighbor's failed attempt to be the next American Idol. We laid in bed pondering if we should be the "good" neighbor and act like we didn't have a clue or do we be the ones that will never let it down. So we decided it was to good to let it rest. The next day is snowed so I spent a good deal of time shoveling the snow. I kept waiting to see them and when I did I had to say something. Our neighbor did inform me that their son got "Rock Band" for Christmas and that night his wife thought she was the next super star. I didn't ask how many drinks she had prior but I am almost certain alcohol had to play a factor for her singing debut. He also said that Michael better watch his back because he is going to get him good. If you know Michael, you know that isn't hard to do. Love you Michael.

I don't know why, but my coat smells like chicken soup. That's all I am going to say about that. Thank you for visiting and God Bless you all. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!

Our Chtistmas Story

Today I feel a lot better than I have the past couple of days, with the flu and almost popping an eye out. I hope to continue with the good fortune. In a wacky way this Christmas was a lot like "A Christmas Story". Let me explain what I mean. First off I almost poked my eye out, just like Ralphie almost did with his Red Rider BB gun. I almost poked my eyeball out differently but, in any case it happened. Now for the Christmas tree. All the trouble I had with it. Putting one up , taking it down and putting another tree up and still had problems. Finally getting the not exactly the lights I wanted (green alien lights as Sally puts it), but never the less ones that worked and I didn't have to return. The difference between me and Ralphie's dad( Mr. Parker or the Old Man) is I didn't topple the tree in the process. I came close ( thank goodness the wall was there) but it didn't go over. Now for Sally, saying a naughty word. I am not sure exactly how it happened but, Sally said the word A$$. Zachary heard and Said," MOM YOU SAID A NAUGHTY WORD. YOU SAID ASS." She didn't get soap in her mouth like Ralpie did but she did get a tongue lashing from Zachary she will not soon forget. Mr. Parker had some trouble with the furnace . I had issues with the Bathroom sink. Different household things we worked on but, same choice of words used while trying to fix the pesky things( sink is unclogged by the way). Our Christmas meal wasn't a traditional meal like we would have liked. Ralphie's family was going to have Turkey, ruined by the neighbors dogs. They had to settle on roast duck with the head still on Chinese style. We were going to have a feast at my brother Mike's house , ruined by illness, had to settle on lemon rice soup and couscous made Sally style. We took Kaity and Zachary to see Santa , at the Indiana Visitors center that was having a tribute to "A Christmas Story"( 5 of the cast members were also there,Flick, Farkus,Randy, Grover Dill and Miss Shields). The Santa area was set up just like the movie. After she saw Santa and went down the slide, she started to climb back up the slide not to tell Santa what she didn't tell him like Ralphie did but, to slide back down again. Now if I only went to Zachary's school I am sure one of his friends probably stuck there tongue to a pole like flick did during the triple dog dare.We also like to bundle up Kaity so much like Ralphie's brother Randy, that I had a hard time buckling her in her car seat. After further reflection, I really wished I would have won the Leg lamp or at least bought one at the visitors center. I believe " The Christmas story "tribute will be there until the 6th of Jan.

In the picture with Kaity in front of the Christmas tree, Sally was taking the picture and Zachary said to Kaity," watch it Kaity or you will get sucked in". This was in reference to Sally's Alien tree comment that she said 5 days ago

Hope you all had a great Christmas and great coming new year. God bless you all!

There was a Chirstmas After All

I had a week off before Christmas. I had made a bunch of plans in my head of things I wanted to do, to insure a Norman Rockwell painting like Christmas. Of course by now, everyone knows my luck so I am sure everyone knows it didn't go quite as planned. If you are one of the few lucky ones to be one of my Myfacebook friends you are probably aware of the unfortunate events.

It all started with the Christmas tree. In fact that could be a blog in itself. I will give the short version instead. The newer pre-lit tree wouldn't light in the middle. Took it down and put up the other tree. None of the lights worked. Had to go out and buy new lights. Not much of selection 3 days before Christmas. Found some I like. there was only 4 packages left. Grabbed them hung them on the tree to find the last string didn't work. Had to take them off and go out again. Couldn't find multi color lights so I ended up buying all green lights. Sally calls it the alien tree. The little kids decorated the tree all by themselves. We were just glad to have it up and done with by this point.

While the tree fiasco was going on, another pot was brewing. Monday evening Sally wasn't feeling well. She woke up in the middle of the night with a full blown stomach flu. Zachary woke up with it as well. Wednesday afternoon Michael and Kaity came down with it to. Wednesday night I went to bed figuring I dodged the bullet but I woke up yesterday to the mighty terror flu. I felt like I was close to death, my time was coming.

Last night Zachary was very excited about Santa. Kaity still didn't feel to well and she really doesn't understand the Santa thing. It was after midnight and Zachary was still awake, telling us to go to bed so Santa can come. Finally around 1AM the big guy arrived. I was told Michael was snooping around under the tree acting like he was 9 instead of 19. He had no will power and opened his gift and jumped around like a little kid. Zachary climbed into bed with us around 4:30. Sally got up with him and they looked at his stocking and both of them fell asleep on the couch. 8am on the button, Zachary was waking everyone up. At that point I realized I left the diaper bag that contained the camera at my mom's( although we did have the camcorder going). So I have no pictures to post. Kaity kept saying "Oooooo" to everything. She sat there with a pile of toys eyeing what she wanted first. She smiled big, made her selection and took her chocolate candy to me to open. She is truly my girl. Zachary said Santa did so well that he can't think of anything he wants for next Christmas.

After the presents were opened and I put batteries in everything I went back to bed. I am still not feel well but much better then yesterday. All of our Christmas plans went out the window because of us being sick. We stayed in our P.J.s all day. It was nice to relax. Kaity was watching Angelina Ballerina. She hurried up and put her Tinker Bell dress on and was trying to mimic Angelina. It was fun watching her. After that I went to clean up a bit. I had another battle but this time it was with a box. I almost lost my eye to the box. I can't say it was a bad Christmas. To see the joy in my kids faces is everything to me. No matter how old we are there is always magic in Christmas.

Merry Christmas everyone. Hope your day was truly a blessed one.

PS I love you

Hey everyone. I am doing well. I have been collecting lots of blog material in my little handy note book. I will be home from the next two weeks so hopefully I will be able to write more frequently. Not sure if it will be daily but I will try since I know how popular my blog has become (cough cough). I wanted to write sooner but between Monday and Wednesday I put in an extra 16 hours of over time. I figure I will catch up on my rest during my vacation.

Thursday I had chemo. The first of the year I will be going for a CT scan and a PET scan. After that I will meet with the doctor and discuss the next round of treatments. If everything goes well the plan will be for another 6 more treatments minus one drug. It's the one that causes the most side effects. He said here and there I will be getting the full treatment but it won't be every time. Which is good because the numbness sensation is becoming worse. Sometimes while I drive my leg goes numb. It takes awhile before it feels some what normal again. The cold is also bothering me and the effects are lasting longer. I use to be able to have a week where I can have cold food and drinks without it bothering me, now it might be a day or two before the next treatment. At least now I have about month break from chemo which I am happy about.

Yesterday, my company had their Christmas party. There was a lucheon at work followed by bowling at Star Dust. I am relectly telling you something that I know I will catch some heat. What is told in this blog must stay in the blog. I write about everyone elses mishaps so it's only fair to share mine as well. Sally and I were on the way to Star Dust. Almost everyone else left directly after the luncheon but I stayed to wait for Sally. On the way there Dan called me asking me where I was at. I was talking to him, trying to listen to Sally as she was telling me which way to go and at the end of conversation to Dan I said "Bye I love you". I always tell Sally (even though she never hears me) "I love you" when I hang up with her. I couldn't believe I told Dan I love him. Even though we are suppose to love everyone, I don't go around tell people especially men that I love them. I was hoping Dan had hung up before he heard it. I know if had heard they will never stop the tourmenting during bowling. So Sally and I walked in and I held my head up high hoping Dan didn't hear. Sally on the other hand kept giggling. I saw Dan and he didn't say a word. I felt very relieved. He didn't hear but he will know now once he reads this blog. Hopefully, by the time I go back to work this will have been forgotten.

After bowling pizza was served and score were calculated to see who had the top scores. Every year I think Sally and I will get the booby prize but we always manage to stay away from it. This year I knew we were going to get it. I am an olympic bowler but my wife on the other hand is not. She usually drops the ball at least once during a game. The game at Avery isn't a typical bowling game. It's 40 frames and each frame has a special. For example there is a Migiligian which when that happens if you don't like your first throw you can reset it. There is also a thing called "sour grapes", which if you don't get a strike then you loose 2-5 points for every pin that is left. Sally kept getting the sour grapes. Every time she got she would get a gutter. The next frame though she always managed a strike. I think she really wanted a prize and knew the only chance was to blow the game and get a booby prize. She managed to cost us 130 points. I decided to wait until the end to recieve the booby prize, since Sally worked very hard to get it. While we were waiting Sally and I were talking with another guy at work. Sally was talking to Tony D. so I thought it would be fine if I left her alone for a couple of minutes. While I was gone a lady took a picture of Sally and Tony. The lady thought they were a couple. I can't leave Sally alone any more. By the way we were not awarded the booby prize. Someone else was actually worse then us. I am still puzzled how anyone could be worse then us. I think a blind couple could have had a higher score then we did.

Tonight we took the kids to a house by Sally's mom. The house is a corner house and they go all out every Christmas decorating. I am not exaturating when I say all out. Some nights Santa is even outside waving. This year we have been driving pass the house looking for Santa and finally we found him tonight. The pictures posted are from the house tonight.

I am sitting here taking a break in fustertarion from trying to put the Christmas tree up. A couple of years ago we purchased a pre lit tree. We thought it would be much easier then trying to mess with the lights. Plus, we needed a smaller one because the other one took up to much room. Last year after we had decorated we noticed a small section was not lit up. This year the entire middle section is not lit. I drove all over looking for fuses thinking it's the fuse but I can not find the fuse any where. Not sure what we are going to do. I thought about putting up a string of lights but the tree lights are green, red, and white and I don't think they sell strings of lights that way. All I know, Zachary is going to be disappointed because he really wanted the tree up and the house decorated.

I am going to take a hot shower (finally after not be able to take once since Thursday) and maybe I will just sleep on it about the tree. Sally mentioned I can take the tree down and put up the other one that is to large for the living room. I am tempted to buy a Charlie Brown tree and be done.

God Bless,
Bill

Zachary and his wisdom part 2

The past week has been pretty good , just the same old tiredness. I feel that most of that is because I am putting in some overtime the last few weeks. Other than that I feel really good. I still have the numbness in my hands and feet, that makes it hard to do a few things at work , but I manage. I try not to make any indication that I my be having some issues. I have one more week of work than two weeks off , I am looking forward too that. I have a lot of things that I want to be able to do with the kids.

Zach the other day told Sally that he felt lonely. I felt really bad that he felt this way. I am back to work and trying to put in some overtime to help catch up on bills and buy Christmas presents. Sally is keeping up the house and Kaity being only two will sometimes demand Sally's time. Zach was always playing with his legoes without a worry in the world. So I always thought he was content. So I will now make sure I am up with him in the morning and call him from work before he goes to bed to let him know that his Daddy is thinking about him and loves him. I will have conversations with him about whatever he wants to talk about. Sometimes that could be a mistake. We were driving in the car going to pick Michael up from Cabela's and he started asking me questions about Mountain Goats. I don't know a lot about Mountain Goats, so I was trying to get off the subject. When Zach would ask me a question, I want to be able to answer it correctly if I can. Mountain Goats is not my expertise. "Hey, Zach lets talk about Three toed Sloths". That is a subject I could talk about and actually answer more of his questions correctly. He asked me "What is a Sloth, Daddy". Now I have him, I thought to myself. "There animals that live in trees and move very slowly". "Daddy will Mountain Goats eat me". Back to those damn Mountain Goats. Yes, they are very mean and like to eat little kids and you should never talk about them again. This is what I wanted to say. I actually said no, they are timid animals and would probably run away from you if they saw you coming. Now we finally made it to Cabela's to pick up Michael. We were a little early, so we decided to go in and look around. We made it in and in front of us was a mountain scenery of all kinds of stuffed animals and on the top of this mountain landscape was none other then a Mountain Goat. Come over here Zach and lets look at the really big Elephant. Then he asked me if Cabela's had all the animals in the world. Another time we walked around Cabela's waiting for Michael again. This time he was interested in the fish. Most kids will run by and glance but not Zachary. We had to tell him the name of each fish. Luckily the names were written underneath each fish. Sally told him to that if he didn't behave there, he would be left to spend the night. She went on to tell him all the animals come to life when the stores closes. So Zachary tried to spend his time at Cabela's trying to prove Sally wrong. He pointed to the birds that were hanging from the ceiling and said they can't come to life because they can't come unattached. He then started to point to some animals asking Sally if they came to life and roamed around how would they be able to leave their spot and get back.

Zach mentioned to Sally earlier this week that he has a friend that doesn't believe in God and that he didn't want to be his friend anymore. Sally told him just because he doesn't believe in God doesn't make him a bad person. It's what you believe that matters. Zachary after a long pause asked Sally if he could invite his friend over to watch a video he has about The Stories of the Bible. I guess he wants to try and convert his friend. Zach is such a good boy and he always asking questions about the Bible, Jesus and Mountain Goats. Sally really did a great job leading him on the right path. Except now he is asking all sorts of questions about religion. Luckily he ask Sally the questions because for most of them I would have no clue how to answer. Sally is calling her mom asking the questions. I would love to see Zachary with a priest asking him the questions. For example last Sunday at Faith Formation, they had a party for baby Jesus. Zachary asked Sally if there are 2 Jesuses. Jesus the baby and Jesus the Savior. Sally had to explain there is only one. When Advent began Sally took him to the religious store to buy Advent candles and an Advent calender. There was a display of holy cards and Sally told him he could get one. Instead of picking the card out by the picture (which is what I would have done) he kept asking the owner of the shop who each Saint was. While they were in the car Zachary came up with a zillion questions to ask. He asked if St. Michael the Arch angel has a sword in Heaven. Then he asked if there is only one devil or many. He then got really sad and Sally asked him what was wrong. He said he is about to cry thinking that the devil doesn't love God. He then started talking about David and Goliath and asked since Goliath was bad did he go to hell when he died. I am sure glad he saves those questions for his mother.

I am trying to make the blogs a little shorter ,because I don't want anyone to get bored. I hope you enjoy what content I do put into them. Thank you and God Bless!

The words of wisdom by Zach.

This has been a long week for me. I had chemo on Wednesday. I am also working 6 days this week plus I had two 12 hour shifts. I am attempting to write this before I go to work. This way tomorrow I can relax and spend the day with my family.

I am doing well. I wasn't able to get the patch for nausea filled because the insurance only will pay for a refill every 23 days and my chemo sessions are every 14 days( duh). I am a little nauseated, just enough to feel uncomfortable. Obviously, I am tired as well. I can't wait until I don't have to wear the pump at home. That is what bothers me the most. The 2 nights I have it on I don't sleep very well. Hopefully in 2 weeks that will be the last of the pump wearing days. During this last treatment I sat next to a gentlemen who has colon cancer to. It had spread to his liver and lymphnodes as well. He had surgery to remove the tumors on his liver. Sally was asking him questions and I just kept watching her. I knew what she was doing by drilling him. We found out he has been in treatment for 2 and half years. He said that just when you think you are almost done with treatment, you find out there is more. I am an optimistic, I believe I am going to beat this. Sally on the other hand is a pessimist and continues to research and ask questions. If you ask her though she would say that I am in denial and that she is trying to be realistic. That could be the reason she has to take "happy" pills now. So as of now I have one more full treatment of chemo. After that I will have another CT scan done. If everything looks good (which I am sure it will) I will start 6 more partial treatments ( a treatment every 2 weeks) which does not require me to wear a pump( just the the one that is already in my chest).

Enough about the cancer stuff. I really need to write more often but because of time I can't. Lately Zachary has been giving me loads of blog material. In fact I will have to have a part 2 of this blog to continue about Zachary. I am not sure what goes through that little brain of his. Quite a bit , I am sure I often wonder what he is going to become when he gets older and I would love to be able to see what he dreams about. The thing that he asked and comes up with is just mind boggling to me. Sally and I are often lost for words during conversations with him. Thanksgiving we had dinner at my mother in law's. She wasn't feeling well because of back pain. The kids were getting rowdy and Sally told Zachary to clean up after his little sis. Well, of course Zachary wasn't to eager to do so. So he stood there for a few seconds goofing around and looked at his grandma (who was watching him) he then turned back around and said "Uh Oh! The camera is watching me" and went and put the toys away. He was so clever that he left Michael pondering what he meant. Sally and Michael proceeded to argue what Zachary meant by that. Michael thought he was talking about a doll and said it was her mom. When Zachary came back we asked him what he meant by camera and he said "Grandma". It was his way of saying his grandma has a watchful eye and that he better be good.

Our kids will put their shoes out the night before St. Nicholas day which is Sunday this year. During the night St. Nick will fill their shoes with some treats. I have never heard of it until I met Sally. It's a Catholic tradition. I have been deprived during my youth so every year I leave my shoe out next to the kids. Hoping St. Nick will make up for all those precious years that was taken from me.(Can't blame this one on Dawn) Every year I try and in the past 11 years the only thing that managed to appear in my shoe was a deodorizer. I will be leaving my shoe out again this year. A dying man can dream right? Anyway, one day Zachary asked me if St. Nicholas is dead or a live. I replied "St. Nick has been dead for many many years.", Zachary quickly replied "If he is dead, how can he leave treats in my shoe?" "Ummm" I thought. Sally was next to me giggling and said "He got you again" which he did. Last night the kids were not going to bed very good. Sally told them if they don't get to bed St. Nick is going to leave rocks in their shoes. Zachary came running from his bedroom excited. He said "Good, I like rocks. I can add them to my rock collection"( I was the one this time that was left giggling thinking to myself she is such a fool.) At least it's nice to know I am not the only one Zachary stumps.

High Ho High Ho off to work I go. I will continue with Zachary and his wisdom soon. Take care and enjoy the rest of the weekend.