Sunday, February 26, 2012

Still Here and Fighting

Didn't mean to take this much time off from posting on the blog.  Life has been busy and there are so many things I want to share. Besides being busy, what has been keeping me away from writing is my health. Unfortunately, I can't seem to get the pain under control.  Once in a while I have a good day but those are far and few in between. I am always wearing pain patches and have to take pain medication as well. The pain is usually worse after I eat and in the evening.  The heating pad has become my best friend. I started to gain a little weight back. With the pain though, it has been difficult to eat and I lost 8 pounds in 2 weeks.   I have lost over 40 pounds since October.  That really does bother me. I am loosing a lot of muscle mass now and I feel like my skin is hanging.  I do not like the way I look when I look at myself in the mirror. 

I am still receiving chemotherapy bi-weekly and waiting patiently for the new chemo drug.  My oncologist seems to be optimistic it will be in March. But every month he is optimistic it will be available the next month.

It seems during the week day, we are busy with medical appointments.  As a family, we average 5 appointments a week.  This week we only have four scheduled appointments so far and they are all for Zachary.  I am happy none are for me but sad they are all for my little pumpkin. Minus the pain, life is still good and there is much happiness in my life.  I know some people think I have given up.  That is far from the truth.  I am still fighting and will not stop.  I have to.  I am not ready or willing to leave my kids.  

That's it for now.  Just wanted to let everyone know I am still alive.  
God Bless,


  1. Sorry about the pain:-( My chronic pain is nothing compared to what you're going through,yet it drains me and leaves me without much mental strength for my family.I hop the new drug comes soon and that it helps with this aspect too.Poor Zachary too.God bless.

  2. Thank you for the update! I continue to pray for you and your family. I will add prayers for pain relief now as well.

  3. Bill,
    It was good to hear from you again. I only wish your post had better news to share for you and your family's sake. You're are always in our thoughts. Good luck with this weeks round of doctor visits. Let's hope Zach is back to his old self soon.

  4. It is nice to see you post an update and I wish you the best. My wife is also dealing with colon cancer (10 years now) and it is now on her liver and lymph system (and has been for 10+ months)

  5. oh bill i will never accept you "giving up" actually i will NEVER believe it if anyone says so cuz i know better!
    if only the pain could be managed and i am sorry that it can' amaze me day after day with your strength and determination and i know that it has to get you down (you and sally) some days but i also know in my heart that you guys have a strong faith and love that holds you up...know that i pray daily (a couple times) for you guys and that will NEVER, EVER stop!
    blessings always